Sunday, September 23, 2018

grammar - Is "this object remains a valid inclusion in a discussion of similar objects" grammatically correct?

The wider context within which I am writing this phrase is:




What is certain, however, is that early twentieth-century piano rolls, while not themselves audio recordings, remain a valid inclusion in a discussion of recordings for their potential to provide insights into ...




Is this grammatically correct? A friend was proofreading my essay and claimed that using the word "inclusion" here was somehow distorting my intended meaning and that "valid element" or "valid aspect" would communicate the point far more clearly.




While I'm 100% not against using 'element' or 'aspect' here, I'm also not at all against using the word "inclusion" - it seems to make perfect sense, as I'm discussing the significance of whether or not piano rolls should be included in such an essay.



Thanks in advance for any tips!

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