Imagine I'm writing a story in past tense. Here come some questions:
SENTENCE 1:
"Tom simply couldn't imagine how different the world had been when his father was at Tom's age: there hadn't been fancy smart phones, people had appeared to be more altruistic, and the parents wouldn't have had to be worried about their kids being killed at school."
Many pulperfects are used. It looks very clunky to me. I suppose the readers would perfectly understand what I mean if I changed all the pulperfects to simple past, which could be:
"Tom simply couldn't imagine how different the world was when his father was at Tom's age: there weren't fancy smart phones, people appeared to be more altruistic, and the parents would have to be worried about their kids being killed at school."
Could anyone, especially native speakers, give me some advices? Do you think it's awkward? Or you think although it looks alright, it would convey different meanings?
My second question is about the back shift of subjunctive mood in reported speech.
SENTENCE 2 & 3
"Tom always said if he had lived in his father's time, he wouldn't have been able to survive for a week. His father always replied that he had used to say the same thing to Tom's grandpa."
Again, for me, they're very cumbersome. I'm not even sure if subjunctive sentences should shift back when they are reported. Can I just write:"Tom always said if he lived in his father's time, he wouldn't be able to survive for a week."?
Also, in the 3rd sentence, "had used to" sounds very awkward to me. Can I just write: "His father always replied that he used to say the same thing to Tom's grandpa."?
I've been confused by these grammatical questions, and they really put me off from writing stories in English. I'd really appreciate your advices.
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